Breaking The Silence

I have been asked before why I don’t do more posts about missing and abused children. The simple answer is I don’t want the message to be lost in the craziness of what this blog has become. I’d love to write about my own parental experiences as well, but the Dorothys and Nancys out there would only use it to slander my family and mount attacks against good people who might comment on such posts. But the story of little Bella Bond has shaken me at my core as a parent and a human being.

This is the latest I have read on the story:

Anyone reading that article knows who the real demons were/are. It sickens me to know that this little girl spent her short life with such cruel, selfish people. Not experiencing a loving, caring family who should make you feel safe and happy. Her life was a nightmare and the so-called adults around her were monsters!

I’m lucky to have had good parents. My childhood was not always easy, but I always felt loved and protected by the adults around me. And it didn’t stop with my parents, it was grandparents and uncles and aunts, I was lucky enough to have a family who let me know I was loved from early on. And my children were lucky enough to have a good father due to how my parents and relatives raised me. And just as it was for me, my kids had more than a good father, their mother, their grandparents, uncles and aunts as well as cousins… they all had a part in the lives of my children. I’m not a perfect parent, nor were mine, but together as a family we did our best to raise happy, responsible human beings. It’s a healthy cycle that leads not only to happy childhoods and well-adjusted adults, but a better world in which we all live in.

I don’t need to say that kids that are abused and bullied have a higher chance of growing up to abuse and bully others. I don’t have to say that many serial killers were badly abused as a young child. I don’t have to say our children learn how to treat others from how they see us treat others. Everyone knows these things…

But maybe I do need to say, although we know these things, we are still failing the children of the world… severely.

Many children still live in poverty and do not get the proper nutrition needed to grow into happy, healthy adults. Think about that. We live in a world where so much of its resources are waisted and misused. Just walk into a buffet and look at how much food is thrown away.  I once worked for a super market, so much food spoils from being left out or just not sold in time, and it is thrown away. It’s not that there is not enough food to feed everyone, it’s just that we don’t really care to feed everyone. Only ourselves and then toss away what we can’t finish. Yes, think about that.

Children are still being sold into slavery and many believe children are property and belong to them. Religion helps cement that idea with some. Again, how will these children treated as slaves and worse ever grow to be happy, healthy adults?

It seems it is even harder for a young person to escape abuse today, when the internet is full of predators and cyber-bullying. More than ever children need good parents, good friends and families to help them to have a happy childhood and make it through all that is stacked up against them.

So to hear another story of how a child was abused, killed, and then discarded like trash by the very people the child looked to for love and protection from the evils of the world, makes me want to crawl into a corner and never come out, because it’s too difficult to look another human being in the eye knowing what they are capable of, knowing the world in which we all live.

That kind of thinking won’t help either. No matter how ugly the world can be, no matter how evil human beings can be, hope can never be lost… instead faith in understanding and change in how we are to each other must always prevail.

Though it is definitely not easy.

I used to think the worst thing you can do is take a child away from their parents. The story of little Bella shows this is just not true. And yet, reports to CPA are often fraudulent and it can be difficult to know what is best to do in some of those situations. Many people call CPA on others over disputes and grudges with no actual worry of the child’s welfare. Add to that poverty and drug addiction and it is not always understood what is best for the child or children in any one situation. Plus just because a child is taken out of a bad situation, it does not mean they won’t be put into a worse one.

So what do we do? Well for starters we need the right people doing the right jobs. Which includes, CPA, foster parents, teachers, etc. “It takes a tribe to raise a child” and today this is truer than ever.

But most of all we need those who are close to a child in trouble to step up and get that child the help they deserve so that they can have the hope they need.

We all deserve a good childhood to grow into happy, healthy adults. Again this isn’t just good for the child’s well-being but the future adults well-being. Therefore this should be the first issue on any discussion of a better America, a better world. Many of our other problems will solve themselves, if the lives of the youth were our number one priority.

Fat Mike, the lead singer of the band NOFX, has written a musical of sorts, that hopefully will make it to Broadway some day. It is called “Home Street Home” and is a look into the lives of young children who leave their homes to live on the streets. Some of the songs in it are lighthearted and need to be because of the serious subject matter. Other songs are almost too hard to listen too. But the album as a whole is important and tells the sad tale of how hard it is to be a young person in this world of adults who have forgotten what it is like to be a young person in this world.

I am posting 2 of these difficult songs below. As difficult as they are, they need to be heard:

If the story of Bella doesn’t make you want to scream out at the world…

If listening to these 2 songs doesn’t make you want to cry out at the injustice of being young without a voice…

If you aren’t really pissed at so-called humanity…

Well, than in my opinion, you are part of our biggest problem… and I only hope you are not a parent.

As for me, tears are pouring down the side of my face and I need a tissue, and I just can’t continue to write any more at this time.